The Promise of Possibilities

Please be sure to change my email address to suzihagen@me.com.  My Earthlink address is no more!

2 April 2014, Arlington VA USA

At last the weather is getting better after that awful weekend of rain-mini-hail-snow.  Walking to the bus stop with my eight-year-old charge, Mickey, has been so pleasant — no umbrella to blow inside out in the wind, no curbside puddles for cars to splash onto us, just a lovely walk on a spring morning.  Tuesday morning’s yoga class felt good but left me more tired than usual.  I actually dozed off while reading after lunch.  So after dinner, I suggested a walk.  Mickey scootered while I walked for almost an hour — over and around the park, through the FDIC Building plaza and the Virginia Square area, then to a yoghurt shop and home.  It was fun to see a park full of people — baseball game on the diamond, kids practicing soccer passes and catching ground balls, lots of tennis players of all ages.  

I was stunned to get two emails today with bad news.  A high school friend is having surgery for breast cancer tomorrow.  And the husband of a friend in Warsaw died following heart surgery. 

Skipped Pilates to prepare for Aideen’s return — cleaning, laundering bed linens etc.  So I walked down to Clarendon and back (about 20 minutes each way) to have lunch with my friends Inga and Adam.  Adam lives near there, and is an art restorer and an antique car “nut” (a collector and restorer).  He’s been helping Inga with car sales/purchases and is always fun to talk with.  We had a delightful lunch.

After dinner, Mickey and I walked to the library so he could look for some books, only to discover we needed a PIN number for Aideen’s library card.  A friendly librarian did something to override the system and allow Mickey to check out two of his favorite “Big Nate” books. (He’s already finished the book I bought him at the International Spy Museum, and by bedtime had made quite a dent in one Big Nate.)  Afterward the library, we walked to the park, again full of people enjoying being outdoors.  Mickey played with a five-year-old whom we met on the  jungle gym.  Mickey was really good at moving hand-over-hand from one swinging bar to the next.  The other boy wanted to play tag, which they did with Mickey alwayshaving to be “it.”  And Mickey handled that really well.  On the walk home we talked about how the younger child didn’t quite get the concept of tag, and Mickey allowed as how he probably hadn’t at that age either.

3 April

Aideen returned today, happy to be home and healthy.  After the last trip we spent the afternoon in the ER as she got tests and prescriptions, later learning for sure that she had giardia. This time it’s only her allergies acting up.  She’ll pick Mickey up at school shortly, then we’ll have dinner at Rus Uz, a Russian Uzbek restaurant that’s a block away and they’ll take me to Bethesda.  Inga and her friend Mary are taking their daughters Franciszka and Abby to New York City for the weekend to celebrate 16th birthdays; they’ll stay in our Peace Corps friend Kim’s apartment.  Kim will come to Bethesda 

4 April, Bethesda MD

Who’d a thunk it?  Those commercials that extol how absorbent their paper towels are are right.  At Inga’s I make coffee using a small Melitta, which takes a cone-shaped filter.  When I couldn’t find one, I used an old standby from my overseas days, a paper towel scrunched into the Melitta.  Into the makeshift filter went the coffee grounds (some great Ethiopian that Aideen had brought me previously).  Over the coffee went the boiling water.  Out came … nothing.  Coffee should have dripped through the paper towel into the mug, something I’d witnessed many times in the past.  Instead the Melitta held a pool of coffee slurry.  I’m off to take Franciszka to school — she’ll drive there and I’ll drive back via the supermarket!

7 April, Minneapolis MN

Home again.  Doing some final sorting of Scotland.  Sally, from the Acapulco trip days, is definitely joining me the second week.  She’ll finalize air reservations from her place in Greece this week.  Looks like a full house for the whole month.  I’ve started to make notes that I’ll email to everyone in May.

8 April

Had a long email from my friend Bob who’s been working in Afghanistan for the last year-plus.  I was curious for a “local” view of the elections.  He feels that the elections succeeded beyond anyone’s expectations, that Afghanis are so tired of the corruption and failed leadership of the current regime and the senseless brutality of the Taliban that they came out to register and to vote in large numbers despite several serious incidents.  He said not only was turnout higher than in the previous election but many more women voted.  One of his Afghan colleagues commented that “the majority has awakened,” and that would certainly be a good sign that we haven’t wasted lives, money and time there.

Voting in Afghanistan

9 April

Just got off the phone with Peace Corps friend Sabrina. She, husband Mark and my adopted grandson Christopher were joining me in Scotland the last week of June.  But that date conflicts with the self-catering cottage they’ve rented; it has to be a Saturday-Saturday stay.  They won’t join me but hopefully will come to Ayr for the few days before that.  Big disappointment but nice to have inspired someone to see the land of half my heritage.

Lots of emergency activity in the neighborhood today.  While running errands, I was passed by a fire engine on 15th Street, a police car on Nicollet and another police car on 1st Avenue — all within 15 minutes.  Didn’t see any smoke nor injured bodies so don’t know what was going on.

My Godson's son
Alijah gets ready for Easter

11 April

So I went to the Thursday water ex class and caught a cold.  Usually I don’t do this class as the instructor is very uncreative and low energy.  But since I’m only here for two weeks, I want to get in as much exercise as I can.  Afterward class, four of us went to coffee, and one woman got coffee refills for herself and me.  She was just recovering from a very nasty cold and I think I got it.  Or maybe it was just bad luck and germs from opening a door.  Anyway, I skipped by favorite class (Andrew’s shallow water class) today and probably will skip tomorrow.  I can hardly breathe but am taking some Sudafed, which I hate but I have to be healthy by next Friday when I leave for Boston etc.  Giving myself some down time, liquids only today, to get healthy!

Aideen has confirmed dates when she and Mickey will come to Minnesota this summer, and I’ve confirmed dates with Janet and Ed to use their cabin part of that time.  Will be fun to have them here.  Hoping that my nephews and their kids can join us.

12 April

I have been trying to figure a good time to call my friend in Poland.  Her husband died unexpectedly last month, and I want to talk to her, to see how she’s doing and what I can do to help.  Although our Polish friends will do what they can to help, she is alone and unlikely to reach out too often.  Thankfully she called me today.  She is devastated, as I expected, and I feel so helpless being here.  This death is just one more reminder of my mortality, something I think about sometimes.  I have more years behind me than ahead of me.  So I have to make the most of every minute.

This afternoon my sister and I went shopping to find carpeting for her condo.  She needs to redecorate and carpeting is the place to start.  We found several that she likes, took samples home and arranged for Home Depot to send a measuring service next week.  Hopefully she can arrange installation in June when I’m gone.  That way she and Stu (her cat) can stay at my place.  Next, a painter.

All this Heartbleed virus stuff is driving this Luddite crazy.  Change password, wait to change passwords.  Argh!  My sister the techie finally found a website with info on which sites are at risk, which has helped.  But I spent a frustrating evening yesterday changing some key user names and passwords.

13 April

A day out with Marilou is always fun.  Since I arrived to pick her up early, I played fetch with her Sammy who has more energy than any 10 dogs.  Then we scoped out the valance for her sunroom before leaving.  We’d tried to use our Groupon to Eat Street Social for lunch one weekday a while back only to find it closed, so we reserved for Sunday brunch today, to be followed by a movie.  After looking at the menu, we weren’t sure we’d spend all of our Groupon value … $60 … then proceeded to overspend it.  Good food though.  Afterwards we drove out to the cheapo Hopkins Cinema and saw “Gravity.”  We’re both a bit acrophobic — thank God we didn’t see it in 3D.  But the graphics were excellent, and although it’s a thin storyline, the acting was wonderful.  I especially like the image at the end when Sandra Bullock finally gets to earth — her rise from the lake to finally standing and walking was so evocative of that picture of humankind’s transition over the millenia.

14 April, Passover begins this evening

I remember well the seders we had at our church, instigated by my Sunday school class.  We did several activities with youth from a nearby synagogue and decided that since the Last Supper was really a seder, we should experience that.  Not sure if the church continued after we graduated from high school.

It was cold and windy when I walked Lake Harriet this morning with my friend Linda, but thankfully we both still had winter gear handy.  It’s been weeks since my last Monday morning walk with Linda, and I haven’t exercised since Thursday, deciding to stay out of the water until I get this cold under control.  Today I can finally breathe again.  Now to decide if I’m going to water ex tomorrow.  That can wait until I get up tomorrow and see how I feel.

I contacted a bunch of high school friends about having dinner when I’m in PA for the wedding.  Had only heard from Bucky and Suzie until today.  Pinky called and several of the Elizabeth gang are interested in joining us.  I promised to follow up with others and we’ll coordinate on Thursday.

This morning I left a voice mail message for my late son Peter’s friend Ole about painting Barbara’s condo. He called this evening to say he’s stopped painting and taken a job with the local distributor of Bobcats, the little tractors.  He’d been doing some part time work for them on the side while continuing to paint, then was given the chance for a steady income with benefits, a definite plus for a family man.  While I’m disappointed that he can’t do the job for us, I am happy for his change.  He’s married with two small children now, and his wife Lauren works for an advertising agency and travels for work sometimes.  Having more certain hours and income will make their lives easier.  

Next month is Peter’s 15th yahrseit, and I’m thinking of doing something in addition to saying kaddish at Temple Israel with Susan.  Susan’s mother’s yahrseit is the same day as Peter’s, and on the first anniversary of his death, she invited me to join her in the Jewish tradition.  I do that whenever I’m in Minneapolis.

16 April

Today’s Minnesota Twins baseball game was called on account of bad weather — snow.  ‘Nuff said.

17 April

Up since 5:30 getting ready to travel:  Stripped off the bed linens.  Did the pile of ironing, mostly flat pieces which I hate to iron (boring).  Quick trip to CVS to get some homemade “Kinder Egg” ingredients (Jonah and Spike in Boston love Kinder Eggs), to the post office to mail a cap that I knitted cap for my friend Marcia’s new granddaughter and to Whole Foods to grab some take out for lunch and sample their fantastic guacamole.  Have completed four loads of laundry, two more to go.  Still need to put clean sheets on the bed, but I’m taking a break.

FYI — KinderEggs are a German children’s treat — a chocolate-covered plastic egg with a prize inside.  Jonah and Spike discovered them while living in London, and you cannot buy them in the US because food products cannot contain nonfood items.  However, I supply them with KinderEggs when I’m in Poland.

Also did my online check-in with Delta … and a Skype call with Steve, who’s also on the Center Board.  I had sent him a draft of my notes/presentation on recommended changes to how the Center’s president is evaluated.  I got samples from HR friends here as well as copies of how the glass company evaluates our board chairman and comments from another board member.  Steve added some good comments.  I’ll finish this when I get back in May.

This afternoon Jan’s coming over to knit and keep me company while I finish my pre-departure chores.  I always do better if someone is around.  Then off to friends Janet and Ed’s tonight so I can be at the airport by 5 am.  Argh!

Yesterday Janet and Sally (of Acapulco fame) and I braved the snowfall and went to Milda’s for lunch.  Milda’s is an institution on the North Side that’s reopened after a fire required relocation.  It’s the epitome of a neighborhood cafe, big servings of delicious comfort food.  Janet and Sally indulged in the homemade beef pasties with gravy; they were “ginormous” the kids say and declared well worth the fatty calories.  Later in the afternoon, I was back out in the thick of it when I drove to my hair appointment at Connie’s.  In the hour or so I was there, heavy wet snowfall covered the car.  We went to dinner at Crossroads Deli, a favorite spot not too far from Connie’s.  More snow to scrape when we finished.  The super slushy highway home was made more dangerous by fast-moving SUVs spraying a high wake onto my little Focus and the need to navigate potholes.  I was so glad to get home safely.  Thankfully it’s in the mid 30s today and snow is melting now.  

18 April, the original Patriot’s Day marking Paul Revere’s ride, Newtonville MA

I never like travel days because I don’t sleep well.  It’s why I prefer early flights to the 3:10 pm to Amsterdam.  Today I was wide awake at midnight, never did fall back to sleep and turned off the 4 am alarm at 3:30.  I was at Janet and Ed’s because, as I wrote last month, they are lots closer to the airport and offer “limo service.”  Their son Thom provided that today.  Since TSA is now recommending two-plus hours in advance of domestic flights, I was at MSP before 5 am for my 7 am flight to Boston.  No long lines this time so I had lots of time to call Expedia about changing my Boston-to-Pittsburgh flight.  That’s what had me awake … my two-leg trip only had a 33 minute window to change planes in LaGuardia.  While it cost me a change fee and a few more bucks for a slightly more costly nonstop ticket, it was worth the price.  Made the change.  Now I’ll leave at the same time but fly nonstop.

My friend Karen, wife of Larry from Peace Corps and mother of Jonah and Spike, picked me up at the airport.  We ran a few errands and picked the boys up at baseball practice before going to the house.  Time to settle in and start catching up, then a short nap before dinner.  Now to bed.

BTW, Paul Revere said, “The Redcoats are coming,” not “The British are coming.”  After all, he was a Brit.

PS  to Class of ’63 readers — Anyone remember our 8th grade history class with Miss Scary when a male classmate who trotted around the room reciting “Paul Revere’s Ride”?  Who was that?  (Non classmates, that was really the teacher’s name. Imagine the fun we had.)

19 April

A day of sports.  Both Spike (8) and Jonah (12) had soccer games.  They are easy to spot on the field and enthusiastic participants. Jonah is taller than his teammates and has a head of curly hair that I wish I had. 

Spike has a lot of longish hair, having decided to follow the Jewish law forbidding hair cuts for 49 days, the time after the Jews’ exodus from Egypt. Spike is less thrilled with not being allowed to eat leavened bread products during Passover. 

I talked and texted with my nieces Michelle and Dyana about plans … Michelle and I are in Boston this weekend to support Dyana’s first Boston Marathon.  Dyana’s laying low while Michelle and her husband Jon play tourist.  Jon has to return to MN tomorrow, so the Michels and I will meet M&D in the afternoon at some point and have a late lunch-early dinner.   Not only is this marathon-and-holiday weekend, but both the Bruins (hockey) and Red Sox (baseball) are playing.  We hoping to catch a dinner table in between the games.

20 April, Easter Sunday

I had made Jonah and Spike “KinderEggs” from big yellow plastic Easter eggs and brought them for Easter.  I made the first eggs easy to find, then sent them on a hunt for the second ones, ala my mom’s Easter basket and egg hunts.  They loved the eggs, but I didn’t know that Spike is allergic to tree nuts and doesn’t care for peanut butter (Reese’s were in the eggs). He traded with Jonah for M&Ms, and I promised to replace his candies with one of his choice when we found a CVS today. 

The weather is perfect for being outdoors.  Karen ordered sandwiches from a hole-in-the-wall sandwich shop in downtown Boston, then we walked to the Public Garden (next to Boston Common) and sat in the sunshine to eat.  My Cubano with turkey and chicken was out of this world.  We had Patches, their dog, with us, and he attracted a lot of attention.  

Jonah, Karen, Spike, Larry & Patches in Public Garden

Michelle and Dyana walked over from their hotel, then we wandered to and through the marathon expo before driving to the North End/Little Italy for dinner.  Boy, did we just make it in time.  Jonah, Michelle, Dyana and I jumped out of the car to find a table.  M&D tried the restaurant where they had eaten the night before.  Italian and excellent … but no room before 8, they called to us from across the street.  Jonah needed a bathroom (truth be told, so did I), so we went into another to use the bathroom and seek a table.  A jovial maitre d’ said yes to both requests … but wouldn’t seat us until we all arrived.  So many more people arrived before Larry, Karen and Spike that I was getting worried.  But they’d finally found a parking space among the narrow, cramped streets and set up the car so Patches would be okay until we’d finished.  We sat, we ate, we enjoyed.  Must write a glowing review of Ricardo’s.

Oh, so we’re walking down the street and Dyana goes into a CVS for a bottle of water.  I join her, trying to remember what it is I needed to buy here besides water.  Then Spike joined me and reminded me … his KinderEgg candy.  I’m so glad he was comfortable doing that; I would hate to have forgotten and disappointed him.  He spent some time deciding and finally settled on mint M&Ms. Interesting choice for a kid.  I grabbed a couple of Brookstones, dark chocolate covered blueberry and pomegranate, to help keep my hands out of the Ms.

21 April, Patriot’s Day holiday and Boston Marathon Day

Dyana finished the marathon in 4:17 and was looking good when we saw her at about mile 18 in Newton.  She stopped for a few minutes of photos, a squirt of water from the boys and short chat, then off she went.  

Dyana and I at the 18 miles mark

I took a bus as far into the city as I could get, but not before tripping on a curb and falling (without serious injury).  Without Larry’s yelling “Suzi. Bus,” I might’ve missed it; I was sending Michelle a text and not looking.  The bus stopped way short of the center due to the race, so I walked forever down Commonwealth.  I finally gave up trying to find Michelle despite her directions.  Finally caught up her and Dyana under the “Paul Revere” statue (it is actually George Washington, but I knew where they intended us to meet).  The 40-minute wait at Cheers was worthwhile for a delicious and perfectly cooked real hamburger, my first in ages.  I ate all the fries and a few of Michelle’s onion rings.  

Michelle and Dyana

Took the T back to the suburbs and Larry met me.  We finished the day watching two favorite teams win, the Penguins and the Blackhawks.  Oh, and USAir upgraded me.  What a great day!

22 April, Boston Logan Airport

Passing the time in a comfortable rocking chair looking out at a beautiful sunny day and airplanes moving to and fro.  Off to Pittsburgh shortly.

23 April, West Mifflin (southeast of Pittsburgh), PA

Staying at the same hotel where I stayed for the 50th reunion last year.

Another great day.  Bucky and I did a Tour of the Township with a stop at Tillie’s in Versailles for lunch, fish sandwiches of course.  We had tried Country Club Tavern in lower Greenock, but it doesn’t open until 4 pm. Bucky’s a friend from Everglade Drive; he joined our class midway through 5th grade.  Like me, he couldn’t wait to abandon the old hometown for elsewhere.  His career in sales has taken him to many places, including Buffalo NY and Marietta Ohio.  I had forgotten that he had two paper routes — he could remember so many of the old residents of the various homes we passed.  We were both saddened to see all of the fences in our old backyards (no more sledding there) and found all of the home additions interesting.

Dinner at Atria’s with Pinky, Eileen, Noreen, Janie, Barb, Suzie, Lance and Bucky.  More catching up and talk of future plans.  Eileen and Noreen may join me in Scotland the same week as Jane, another high school friend.  And agreement that we want to do something collectively for our 70th birthdays next year.

Suzie and Suzi, grade school "twins"

28 April, Robinson Township PA 

What a great weekend.  The wedding on Saturday was heavenly … gloomy morning turned gorgeously sunny just as Alexis and Marcus left the gazebo to ‘walk down the aisle.’  Short but very personal ceremony; the officiant was a friend of theirs and this was his first wedding.  Way too much delicious food — ‘continental breakfast’ before the ceremony, huge buffet brunch after.  I’m sure I gained five pounds on Saturday.  Bob gave a heartfelt toast that drew tears.  Dancing to a variety of old music genres.  We helped clear things at the end of the afternoon and did so efficiently that the caterer wanted to hire us.

Alexis and Bob

Marcus and Alexis

Before that, lots of fun and great food.  OD’d on tacos and mac & cheese at Smoke, a hole-in-the-wall place in old Homestead that Alexis and Marcus had previously found and Bob now adores.  This was his second visit this trip.  OD’d on pizza another night, the first pizza I’ve eaten in months.  I took his Reno grandsons to the Strip District and Carnegie Museum of Natural History on a rainy afternoon.  I got a few tee-shirts and some Polish candy in the Strip but the boys didn’t get anything.  They thought they’d find non-Pittsburgh teams represented.  Not!  Lunch at The Porch in Oakland was surprisingly good for ‘order at the bar and have delivered at the table’ service — a salad with perfectly cooked salmon for me, burger for Tyler and strip steak for Jacob.  Someone said it’s owned by the same folks who own my old high school hangout, Eat ’n’ Park.  Hmmm.  

Jacob and Tyler at lunch

Most everyone left on Sunday.  I drove the long way to Ligonier for a brief respite in Linn Run State Park and a big homemade ice cream cone in town.  Then back at the Central cafe next to the hotel, dinner and wine with high school friend Janet.

Now it’s off to Boston again.

Later … at the new new Pittsburgh International Airport (not to be confused with the old new airport or the old airport)

After flying into Pittsburgh first class, I’m flying out in steerage, not only paying for my one checked suitcase but relegated to the last group to board.  Ah, the fickleness of airlines.

30 April, Boston Logan Airport

I’m pooped but in all the best possible of ways.  The reunion with two of my three freshman year roommates, Karyn and Karen, was amazing.  Haven’t seen either of them since graduation in 1967 although Karyn and I have been in touch off and on over the years.  Karen seems to be doing pretty well, despite several serious health issues.  She’s always had an optimistic outlook, and that has to be helping.  The retirement community where she lives is beautiful and populated by a warm and friendly staff and residents.  Food was wonderful (unfortunately for my waistline).  I had seafood both nights, cooked as perfectly as you’d expected at a Cape Cod restaurant.  We yakked and yakked and amazed each other with the minutiae we recalled of life back in Willard Hall. We looked at photos of who we used to be and laughed a lot.  I googled our friend Melissa, found her in New Jersey, and we surprised her with a call.  Karyn and I both said we’d be back … and I know we will.  How do we let people who meant so much to us get away for so long?  No more.  

Karyn, Karen and I

Later, Minneapolis MN

Raining.  Delta didn’t lose my suitcase.  My wonderful sister picked me up and is happy:  The Pittsburgh Penguins won the first round in the hockey playoffs.  Despite the last minutedness of the their wins, Barbara did not have a heart attack or stroke.  Tomery got her birth certificate and now, we hope, can renew her passport and be off to Mexico next Monday.  Ah, procrastination is in the genes of we Kanyr women.

Home at last.  My laundry basket overfloweth.  So in addition to that, back to water ex and detox tomorrow.  Maybe by the weekend, I won’t feel so bloatedly fat.  

March comes in like a lion …

1 March 2014, Minneapolis MN USA

I am sooooo ready for winter to be over. My niece Michelle and I decided to drive to a newish restaurant in suburban Edina for dinner tonight.  No parking spots in their too-small, very snowy lot but a big ramp a few blocks away.  We trudged over icy sidewalks and frozen snow mounds to learn there would be an hour long wait (they don’t take reservations). So we trekked back over the icy sidewalks and frozen snow mounds against the sub-zero wind chill to a different restaurant.  We had a bit of a wait there but got a corner table and enjoyed the rest of the evening … until it was back out into the arctic to walk to the car.  

2 March

Water in the Y pool continues to be colder than usual. 80F, they say. Sounds hot but really isn’t.  But it sure makes one work harder at water ex.  The heater has not worked properly since Friday.  I hope they get it repaired soon.

Parking at the Y

My nephew Christopher and his girlfriend Jen, and my late son Peter’s best friend Thom came to dinner.  Mom’s roast pork and sauerkraut with her traditional additions — homemade apple sauce, peas and lots of mashed potatoes.  From scratch curr’n’ cake (raisin squares) for dessert.   My sister arrived for dessert.  Chris made a lovely fire in my fireplace, and it was fun to have Thom with us; it’s been a while.  When they left, I cleaned up, then watched the balance of the Oscars.  I was ecstatic to see my choice for best picture win, “12 Years a Slave.”  And I thought Ellen Degeneres did a fabulous job as emcee.  Loved the selfie with the stars that took down Twitter … and the pizza order (was that ad libbed?).  Hope they have her again next year.

3 March

Tonight, during the two hours my friend Judy and I were at the Dakota Jazz Club on Nicollet Mall, it snowed.  Not a lot but still …. Judy lives closer to downtown than I.  Since it’s way too cold to walk from my place or stand around waiting for the ever-20-minutes bus, I drove to her building and parked there.  Then we could trek through her building and its neighbor to the mall and walk two blocks to the Dakota.  We heard the Manhattan Transfer.  The show was wonderful — they sang some old familiars as well as others, and their harmony is as spot on as ever.  The club was full for the 7 pm show.  Lots of clapping and knowing laughter as they harmonized on familiar songs.

My college friend Marcia is a grandmother!
I love this photo best of those she emailed.

4 March

One thing makes winter, especially this particularly cold, snowy one endurable — even in this awful weather, most Minnesotans remain nice.  My street is a snow emergency route that many use to get to the freeways east and north and city and school buses take to one-way 26th Street westward, as I do.  Both sides are lined with high blackened snow banks and bumper-to-bumper parked cars, a few with broken side-view mirrors because the roadway has shrunken significantly.  We basically have one extra-wide lane, not two normal ones.  You get the picture.  Yet inevitably cars will take turns pulling over so others can drive safely down the narrowed street.  Minnesota Nice.

6 March

For those of you who think I lead such an exciting life, here’s how I’ve spent this morning.  

• Up before seven, made and drank one cup lemon water, walked to front entry to get paper, read it, worked two crossword puzzles.  No water ex today.
• Checked email, more changes among those joining me in Scotland.  This is becoming real work to organize!
• Ate breakfast of muesli, fruit, rice drink, two cups of coffee.  
• Finalized what I can re 2013 taxes for accountant.  Called brother Dan with question; he’s out walking.
• Showered and dressed.  
• Checked all knobs on doors and closets and tightened as needed (I think the cold winter dried them out more than usual, many were quite loose).  
• Re-ignited pilot light on my hot water heater (an unseen gremlin blows it out every week or so; never know how long it’ll stay on and repair fellows cannot find anything wrong; what can be replaced has been, so I check before every shower).

Now to fix lunch, then walk downtown to meet friend Susan and have for pedicures. Best part of the day.

7 March

Today it is freezing.  No, I don’t mean I’m especially cold.  In fact, I feel warmer than I have in a long time.  The thermometer has actually risen to 32F (0C), the temp at which water freezes.  But it feels like a heat wave after all those sub-zero days.  And we have more “warm” days to come.  Perhaps spring is really on the way.

9 March

Relaxing after having company for dinner — Peace Corps friends Sabrina and Mark and son Christopher from St. Paul plus Mike, Elke and  son AJ from the apartment below.  It was wonderful fun watching the boys, AJ is two and Christopher 7, get to know each other and find things they both enjoyed.  A warm, wonderful family Sunday dinner.  Must do more of these when I’m in town.

10 March

It’s so nice today that after my friend and neighbor MaryAnne and I walked to/from a leisurely late lunch at one of our favorite nearby spots, I sat outdoors, on my deck, for an hour.  What a treat to enjoy the fresh air.  I could hear birds chirping, see the melting snow dripping, hear cars splashing through puddles.  I could pretend that spring was springing.

11 March

Temperatures … and my emotions … are on a roller coaster.  Late yesterday morning I learned that Karen, my closest friend from college, had died the night before.  She’d been diagnosed and treated for a rare bile duct cancer last year, I’d visited her in September, and we’ve had sporadic calls and emails since then.  I’d been reminding myself to call her for several weeks.  Karen loved the Olympics so I postponed calling during those weeks; she’d be busy watching.  And more recently every time I thought to call was in late evening when she might already be asleep. My night-owl college roommate had become an early-to-bed person, tired from the aftermath of the treatment.  This morning I’d vowed that I would call her today … then her childhood friend Carol called me first.  And I called our closest college friends Marcia and Barbara.  Unfortunately neither will be able to attend the funeral, which will probably be next week.  Marcia became a grandmother for the first time earlier this month — her daughter Suzie had a beautiful baby girl.  Barbara and her husband are taking their family to Jamaica for their wedding anniversary.  I will be there for all of us.

I met Karen during my sophomore year, her junior year, at Northwestern.  Don’t remember seeing her during rush week but got to know her after I pledged Kappa Delta.  Other than both being journalism majors, we didn’t outwardly have a lot in common, but we clicked and I was happy that she picked me to be her pledge daughter.  I still have the stuffed Piglet she gave me that day.  From thence, she became “Mother Dear” and I, “My Child”  and Marcia, “Auntie.”  Karen and Marcia had been freshman year roomies and were as close as any related sisters.  Barbara became Marsh’s pledge daughter.  I met Barbara before rush because she lived across the hall from me and the Karen I’m visiting on Cape Cod next month,.  (Yes, I know a lot of women named Karen … and Janet and Barbara and variations on Mary and Susan … it’s a generational thing.)   None of us was really into the whole sorority thing, but in those days at NU with no student union, campus life centered on the Greeks.  We all joined the one house that let us be ourselves — yet with its Old South roots was the least like us.  Karen did love rush week  though, and she gave it her all and, infected by her enthusiasm, we followed suit. And we worked to bring KD into the 20th Century.

My pledge paddle from Karen;
landscape was painted by Marcia

After college, we all went different ways but kept in touch.  A fading photo of Karen, Marsh and me when we attended Barbara’s wedding is hanging on my “family photo wall.”   When my late son Peter was born, she made him a personalized album of “The Day You Were Born,” full of clippings and her handwritten commentary signed by “your other grandma.”  Sometimes I’d drive over to Ohio to visit Karen when I went back to Pittsburgh.  I took Peter along on one trip.  Only child and childless Karen had prepared a picnic and location perfect for a young kid.  We talked and listened to an outdoor concert while Peter thoroughly enjoyed the park and food.  He instantly loved her.  His cremains now reside in a Doric urn provided by Karen.  

After a stint as an in-house editor for BF Goodrich, Karen joined the concrete burial vault manufacturing company her dad had started, and as her parents died, took over running the company and staying active in trade organizations.  A funeral director I knew when I was a newspaper reporter told me he’d met my mother at a trade show.  Took me a minute to realize he’d met Karen, not my biological mother.  My ex Bob was fascinated by Karen’s multi-paged Christmas letters, a detailed recitation of what was going on in her world, so different from ours.  When I joined Peace Corps, my dreary days were brightened by Karen’s long letters.  Bemused and befuddled by my request for twist ties (most Americans had way too many while Poland lacked any way to secure plastic bags), nevertheless she sent me a lifetime supply.

When Stephanie, another sorority sister-friend who’d moved to Karen’s town, was diagnosed with lung cancer, Karen who hated hospitals became her and her family’s solid support.  She kept in touch with those kids even after their mom died.  Unfortunately she didn’t give up smoking.  So when she, Marsh and I met in Evanston for a mini reunion one homecoming weekend a few years ago, she got a single smoking room, and Marsh and I shared a smoke-free one.  Marcia had quit long before.  

Except for not smoking and being thinner, Karen was pretty much the same Karen when I saw her last fall.  She had a delightful couple of days planned for us, and I left with a faint hope that she’d beat the cancer and a strong fear she wouldn’t.

13 March

I’ve been on line and on the phone arranging to attend Karen’s funeral on Tuesday morning.  It’ll be a one night trip to Akron-Canton Airport via Atlanta, two long flights each day.  Karen’s friend Carol and her husband will pick me up, and we’ll all stay at the same hotel I stayed in in September.  

15 March

Yesterday’s visit with my friend Lois in Northfield was a good tonic for dealing with my grief.  She was in good health and good spirits.  We went out to lunch at the Ole Cafe, a favorite spot not far from where she lives, then ran errands at Target.  All the way there and back, I sang along with the oldies and cried, also a good tonic.  Today I dosed myself with a funny movie:  I went to the gorgeously renovated Uptown Theater and sat in a big, comfy leather seat and watched “The Grand Budapest Hotel,” a film that’s gotten well deserved positive reviews.

Made arrangements yesterday to stay at friends Janet and Ed’s house Sunday night.  They live much closer to the airport, meaning I could sleep a bit longer and drive less distance at that ungodly hour.  (I have to be at the airport by 4:30 am.) Today Janet emailed that she wants to pick me up on the way back from their cabin and take me to the airport and to have their son Thom pick me up on Tuesday night.  I agreed.  Sometimes it’s good to let others take care of me.

16 March

Stand-up comic David Brenner’s obit was in today’s papers.  I met him when he stayed at the Bloomington Marriott Inn, then a Minda PR (and my) client.  He was very gracious and let me get a photo of the two of us which is somewherein storagein my college trunk.

I spent a frustrating hour-plus on line, on hold and on the phone with Delta trying to book a ticket for my niece.  I wish they’d get their web site working properly.  I have had problems every single time I”ve booked ticket lately … and that has been quite a few tickets.

19 March

Snow again.  But then it’s Minnesota high school tournament time when it always snows.

An exhausting two days going to Karen’s funeral.  Stayed at Janet & Ed’s Sunday night.  Ed made a delicious pasta with pesto and onion-mushroom-sausage sauce and a caesar salad.  My tummy was wonderfully full when I hit the bed at 9 pm.  Up at 3 am Monday and off to the airport at 4.  Maybe could’ve waited another 15 minutes or so, but wasn’t taking any chances that 10 charters to warmer climates would be queuing with me at security.  Actually I was so early that most of the security entries weren’t open yet.  Two long flights - MSP to Atlanta, Atlanta to Akron-Canton Airport.  Karen’s childhood friend Carol was waiting for me as I exited.  She, her husband Jon and I went to Bender’s, one of Karen’s favorite Canton restaurants, to meet Athene, Karen’s friend from her days at B.F. Goodrich.  We all know each other but have never met.  It felt good to have faces to attach to names and others to grieve with.

Carol and Jon were staying at the same hotel in Massillon as I, so we returned there for a rest and to change before doing to the visitation in the evening.  Meeting more people that I know so well from Karen but have never met —her cousin Bob and his wife Modean, their four now-adult kids, Monica, Michelle, Tom and Tim and their families; high school friends like Sally and Kathy; the men from the plant; and especially Jennifer, the daughter of our late friend Stephanie.  Carol, Jon and I had a late dinner at Kosmo’s, across from the hotel and another favorite of Karen.  Carol and I split fish tacos so we could each have blackberry cobbler — huge ala mode servings worth the calories.

The funeral service was full of family, friends and colleagues and beautifully done.  I had been debating whether to speak and finally did.  Just a few minutes about the woman who called me “My Child” and in return became “Mother dear.”  After the cemetery, the church cooks had a comfort-food meal hot and ready — roast pork, scalloped potatoes, green beans, apple sauce and cake.  After that, I borrowed folks for photos to share with Marcia and Barbara.  Carol and Jon dropped me at the airport on their way back to Dayton.  And I made my way back through Atlanta to Minneapolis.  Despite the colder temp and snow, I waited outside to breathe fresh air at last.  

Putting faces to names:  Sally, Athene,
Carol and me

I was fried by the time Thom picked me up at the airport just before midnight last night, but it was all worthwhile.  I could not be anywhere else but with others who loved Karen.

Of course, just when I thought nothing could get worse, I opened a summons that arrived in the mail from Hennepin County District Court while I was gone.  I’ve been assigned jury duty beginning 21 April — Boston Marathon day!  This morning I completed the paperwork on line, requested a postponement and hit “save.”  As it did that, I noticed I’d put a mid June date, not mid July.  Argh!  I’ll be in Scotland in mid June.  Quick call to the court, a few “press 1 for …,” very short wait, then a real person, a helpful friendly one who adjusted the date for me.  I’ll get a confirmation in two weeks that I’m to report at the end of July.  Now to prep for tomorrow’s flight to DC …

20 March

I have found spring!  It’s alive and well and coming to life in the Washington, DC, area.  Landed at National before noon today to sunny skies, warmish breezes and only a hint that snow had ever fallen here.  It was a treat to stand outside and wait for Inga.  We had lunch with our friend Adam, ran errands (including picking up my 2012 tax return CD, then I waited for Aideen to pick me up at Inga’s house.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if my two weeks here continued this weather trend?  

21 March

Still nice weather.  Aideen and I walked Mickey to the bus stop today before I took her to the airport.  A vertible UN of parents and children gathers on a street corner about three blocks away.  It’s fun to see the various ages and backgrounds of kids interacting so well.  Mickey’s friend Sasha, who’s in fifth grade, always yells out when the bus is visible down the street.  

23 March

A bit overcast today but still … Yesterday I rounded up Regina’s two boys, Liam and Roan, and Mickey and took them to the newest Muppets movie at a nearby mall.  We stopped to get Mickey’s hair cut and for a yoghurt on the walk back, then drove to Regina’s in Alexandria.  On the way Roan and Mickey were debating characters in Greek mythology.  I think it started as a video game discussion.  Wonders never cease …

Regina and I had a lovely time catching up.  She has a full-time temporary job during someone’s maternity leave and good leads on something to follow that.  Hurray.  And she now has a cute Havanese puppy named Lola (“Her name was Lola.  She was a showgirl …”).  Lola’s mostly black with white paws, baby soft curly fur and lots of energy.  The boys alternately ran around the back yard playing with her and chasing each other and played on the computer.  I was pleased that Mickey spent more time in the yard than with the computer.  He fell asleep quickly last night.

We spent this afternoon at the Playseum in Bethesda.  I’d driven by this place scores of times and always been curious, thinking I’d take Inga’s younger daughter, Antonia.  So this morning I went on line and found two Playseums, the Bethesda one and one near Stacey and Michael in DC.  Unfortunately Stacey and her daughters were busy, so we went to Bethesda.  It was an ugly overcast day, a good one for something indoors but active.  The Upstairs at the Playseum is for eight year olds and up and is full of games and activities, from making your own lip gloss to pillow fighting, from board games to pool, foosball and ping pong.  Lots of kids, including at least one birthday group.  Being without built-in playmates (other than yours truly), it took Mickey a while to get into the swing of things.  I played a few games with him but mostly tried to encourage him to ask others to join him, which eventually he did.  And he took part in an eating “dare” in the kitchen.  The hostess offered three dares — gross, sticky and brain freeze.  Winner of each got a free scoop of candy from the bowls in the lobby.  Mickey didn’t take part in the gross (a hunk of dill pickle in a couple of ounces of Coke), but he took on sticky (very old tough caramel and a large soft marshmallow, to be chewed and swallowed completely) and brain freeze (scoop of vanilla ice cream with a dab of chocolate sauce and whipped cream, all to be eaten with hands behind the back).  While he didn’t win, he did seem to have a good time.

Mickey eats his sundae hands-free

Tonight I was watching an episode of HBO’s True Detective when the Woody Harrelson character said to the Matthew McConaghey one that he was using too many “$10 words.” When I was in high school, those multi-syllable words were called “50 cent words” … ah, inflation is everwhere.

28 March

A quiet week.  I did get to one Mixed-level Pilates and one Senior Yoga class so I’m feeling virtuous.  I also have been more careful with what I eat … sort of.  Finished the Dark Chocolate Covered Blueberries — they are no longer a temptation.  I still have a few more small packets of the pomegranate ones for Mickey’s snacks but not more for me.  

28 March in Minneapolis

29 March

60 F but overcast and raining.  Good day to see “Mr. Peabody & Sherman” in 3D.  Mickey’s friend Sasha went along.  Now they’re playing video games here for a while.

Scotland is filling up!  For a while I thought I might spend half the month alone, but Dianna from my Macedonia days, Jan from my South Sudan days, Jane from way back to junior high and the cousins are firming plans, and Bob from Macedonia et al. has reservations and will to stop en route home from Afghanistan. We’ll meet in Amsterdam and fly over together.  Sabrina, Mark and son Christopher from St. Paul and Dorota, Jacek and son Franiu from Warsaw have confirmed their reservations too.  I am getting psyched again.

30 March

The March lion is roaring to the end in the DC area today.  It was raining buckets all morning, then as Mickey and I went to a late lunch, tiny, tiny hail pelted us.  An hour so so later when we left the diner, it was snowing.  Now it’s bedtime and raining again.  All the while the wind has been howling.  We went to the International Spy Museum today and had to walk several blocks from garage to museum (our wet, windy walk would’ve been shorter if we’d taken the Metro).  Our huge umbrella was turned inside out half a dozen times.  I finally gave up.

Mickey sending secret message
at Spy Museum

31 March

Halfway decent weather at last.  Went to yoga today and I can feel it.  Mickey went home from school with his friend Sasha, who lives nearby.  I had dinner with an old friend from my Africa days who lives near here (another Susan).  She was jet lagged but we had enough time to get up to date before her eyes got too sleepy.  

And when short February’s done …

28 February 2014, Minneapolis MN where the current temp is 0F (-18C)

February has seemed anything but short to just about everyone that I know, especially those of us in Minneapolis-St. Paul.  Parking is now restricted to one side of the street to make room for the tall, icy piles of dirty snow.  Record cold temps here, blizzards in Atlanta, drought in California.  I’ve been a little … some days a lot … lethargic.  Hence, no daily additions to this, just one long summary.

I did start the month in a most wonderful way … attending the wedding of my nephew John and Heather in Brainerd.  Can’t think of a nicer way to spend a frigid weekend than with family and friends celebrating a joyous occasion, made more so by the execution.  It was the most family-centered wedding I’ve ever attended — all of their siblings and spouses were part of the wedding party, and almost all of their nieces and nephews took part in the ceremony.  On the Hagen side, only my Godson Craig’s five-month-old son sat out.  Heather’s dad, a Baptist minister, performed most of the ceremony, including a warm, funny talk, to a packed sanctuary.  Afterwards, the church reception was a mini carnival complete with cotton candy, popcorn, corn dogs and more.  I think there were more children than adults at the reception, and they were having a ball.  We Hagen women had our picture taken with fake mustaches, hats and such.

Craig and Alijah

The Fargo contingent was in attendance — my nephews, Mark and Jeff, and Mark’s son Brennan, my brother-in-law Jim and his wife Joan.  Brennan and I bonded while splashing around, and each other, in the hotel pool.  The Hagens and close friends gathered in a small meeting room at the hotel after the reception and continued the good times over snacks, beer and wine.  Unfortunately the room was too small for dancing.

Joan and Jim

In other good news Jim has been accepted into a cancer drug trial at the Memphis treatment center.  He’ll start in March.  Hurray.

Elyse, Sally and Michelle

You may recall that I was ambivalent about a higher education project in Kosovo even though I’d agreed to be proposed as chief of party.  Well, one morning I had an email from my contact at the implementing NGO with ‘good news and bad news.’  He said the good news was that our proposed Kosovo partner had heard our proposal won; the bad news was the University of Pristina students had been rioting.  Although I was en route that day to the dentist (time to get my broken tooth crowned), I decided that I had to seriously make a decision — would I return to work or not.  After much pro’ing and con’ing, I decided that yes, I would take this assignment if it came our way … only to get home and find an email from the same contact.  They’d had official communication from USAID that their proposal was rejected.  I was flabbergasted … not that the Kosovo contact had been wrong or that we’d lost, that stuff happens.  But USAID making a decision on a competitive bid in 30 days?  Unheard of!  I’ve known them to take a year or more.  Somewhere in this scenario is a message to me … but how to noodle it out?

Bad weather means I have to find ways to force myself outdoors, like taking a regular water exercise class where members will ask where I’ve been if I don’t show up.  Or arranging to see a movie (“August: Osage County” with Janet), a musical (“Cabaret” with my sister, Jan and Marilyn) and a play (“The Last Five Years” with Jan and Marilyn).  Yes, it was a very cultural month.

I only made it to Northfield to see my friend Lois once due to weather conditions mostly.  When I talked with Lois this morning, she saw new snowfall and snowdrifts which concerned me.  The roads south of the far suburbs are wide open and easily drifted over. I was feeling guilty about not going because we didn’t get as much snow as predicted.  Then I heard about a horrible wreck near Northfield; three college students were killed and two more hospitalized after they skidded on the ice and hit a big truck.  Glad I stayed here and did chores.

It’s been 50 years since The Beatles arrived in the US to appear on The Ed Sullivan Show.  I was a freshman at Northwestern and remember the first time I heard one of their songs.  It was right after the holiday break, and a girl on our floor had gotten their album for Christmas and played it for us.  We swooned.  During the Ed Sullivan broadcast, I took photos of my dorm mates watching the program … the looks of joy, ecstasy, delight, on our faces mirrored those of the girls who got to seem them in person.  I watched the re-broadcast of a live special that featured old clips as well as both Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr performing … and interviews with the adult versions of some of the girls at that first show.

It’s always fun to have Stuart Little visit for a while.  My sister Barbara flew to New York to see her daughter Tomery, so Stu kept me company and warmed my lap whenever I sat down.  He is a big fella but acts like the undersized kitten he used to be, romping and chasing and begging for his breakfast at 6 am.  I miss him and though I’d love to get another cat or two, I have “miles to go before I” … settle down.

Stu and I

Did anyone see the hype about Facebook buying WhatApp?  Well, I got a text headline on my iPhone from CNN (or maybe BBC, I get them from both) that said Facebook had bought a “massaging” service for multi-billions.  Got quite a laugh when I read it … and less than an hour later a corrected message (massage?) arrived.  Wonder what happened to that copy editor?

My friend Margo’s husband died, and she asked if I’d help with the funeral, including being the “emcee/referee.”  While they had been separated for 13 years, they were cordial and continued to work together on the Northeaster and NorthNews weekly newspapers they owned.  However, a girlfriend was involved and potential family issues might arise too.  The situation was fraught, as the ‘little guy’ on Allie McBeal would say.  I agreed with the assessment and to take on the task. Plus Margo just need to “be” not to “do” like she usually is.  The Heights Theater was almost filled with their newspaper, community, music friends and family.  Cafes and coffee shops from Northeast Minneapolis provided tasty refreshments that Margo’s friend Noreen and I sampled to be sure nothing was poisonous.  Since I rarely eat at such events, I knew I was nervous when I dove into the cheese tray, dessert bars, edamame pate …  But all went well, I reconnected with several former clients from my enterprise facilitation days in Northeast, and I even received compliments about how nicely I handled things.

Played airport limo driver several times this month.  My niece Michelle’s return from San Francisco had to be this month’s “trip from hell.”  I was supposed to meet her on Tuesday evening, but the flight was delayed, returned to the gate and delayed, then cancelled; she’d arrive Wednesday afternoon.  I was timing a trip to the Apple Store in Southdale mall with the airport run and had decided on a layover at Janet and Ed’s between Apple and airport.  Haven’t seen them in a while.  And it’s all south of the city.  Michelle’s early morning flight was delayed but finally took off more than two hours late.  She looked exhausted when she arrived; she’d been up before 4 am. I was glad that I had brought her some homemade vegetable soup and store-bought croissants to have for supper.

Made a bunch of airline reservations this week.  The Flying Nanny returns to DC on 20 March for a couple of weeks.  The combined Boston Marathon-Alexis and Marcus wedding trip has taken on an extension.  It was cheaper to buy two separate round trip tickets (MSP-BOS-MSP and BOS-PIT-BOS) than one circular ticket.  So post wedding, my college roommate Karyn who lives in Connecticut will meet me at the Boston airport, and we’ll drive to Cape Cod to see our long lost roommate Karen for a couple of days.  Haven’t seen either of them in decades although Karyn and I have periodically been in touch over the years.  Looked at flights for my May board meeting in Poland that will include the month in Scotland.  Again, two round trips are cheaper than a circular trip — go figure.  The beds are filling fast.  In case you’re interested in joining me, send me an email ASAP — suzihagen@ me.com

And with that I will end this last minute run-through of short February.  Weather forecasts for Minneapolis in March aren’t much different from February … so I am grateful to be leaving and hoping for decent weather in the DC area.

Parking at the Y

Before I forget, I am giving up my Earthlink account shortly.  Please be sure you change my email address to suzihagen@me.com.